I realize I have be holding on to things, Money, Relationships, my dreams and basically my whole life. And I realize that I need to surrender these to you. That I need to surrender everything to you, and take up the cross. To take on your mission, and live this life of yours following you. I don't want to be of the world, I want to be yours. Take me Lord! Change me, lead me on the path to follow after you. Help me to live my life in total surrender. I realize I'm a person who trends to want control, help me to surrender to you. I want to one day be kneeling before you and hear you say the words "Well done." I know that it will be worth it. God, Help me surrender!
Saturday, April 4, 2015
I'm never going to feel ready, for my trip, for marriage, for life. No matter how I prepare or lack of (cough), I'm never going to feel completely ready for the tasks or changes in life. Like a batter at home plate, the baseball is never going to be thrown at you in a straight line. It's going to curve, it may even have an unexpected spin. The thing is you're not just going pull back and let the chance at a home run stop you from swinging your best shot back.
Just for the record I'm not a baseball player, so my analogy is probably slightly flawed to a professional, but it was the best I could think of. : P
Sunday, February 1, 2015
I don't know how to put words to what this is like. I never thought love could be like this. It's not a giddy bubbly warm type of love that comes and goes (although I do get get warm and giddy sometimes), It's not feelings that are just on the surface, this is emotions coming from deep underneath. I don't know how long these emotions have been building. Now that I've experienced this love I know that this is real. Like this quote from The Giver "Feelings are just meaning on the surface, but emotions are primal." ~Lois Lowry. I don't think this love is going to drift away, it's primal. I love him and I may just love him till forever.